Rando Report: How Curling My Eyelashes Changed My Life, A Sale To Remember, Living In Adidas Track Pants

of Dimepiece attempted to sell a zillion-dollar Rolex. We also had Rick Owens-obsessed couple Fiona Luo and her beau Michael Smith, who I profiled for Vogue eons ago, downtown-beloved Chrissie Miller, whose Proenza Schouler x Grateful Dead top that was later snapped up by another downtown princess, and I-D’s Steff Yotka’s men: her father Walt who walked Chopova Lowena and her fiance Aaron Silberstein!

These Neverworns Live! Shopping events are in-person and yet for people far away because the best part is you can bid on everything you see. Neverworns Live! Shopping is typically every other Sunday, except for these coming few, pending birth timing, BH. Note: I’ll be on a vague maternity leave over the next two months, but I plan on doing specialized Neverworns Live! Shopping sales in the meantime, so stay tuned! Sign up here—ps you can get $15 off a purchase via this link…LFG.

The Spirituality of Eyelash Curling

Opening of *The Devil Wears Prada* (2006)

Yesterday, my schedule was filled with boring errands. There was the pilgrimage uptown and then the slog downtown. The doctor’s appointment. The endless subway ride. Nothing out of the ordinary. But before I left my house, I did something I only reserved for special occasions: I curled my eyelashes with a CVS-bought Revlon curler and put on two coats of Dior mascara, specifically a $33 metallic tube of Iconic Overcurl Waterproof Mascara that I got from Bloomingdale’s. My face opened up. My eyes lifted. I had big Audrey Hepburn peepers. The whole primping act took a total of 45 seconds. Throughout the day, my posture was straight. I was more organized. I walked with purpose.

Curling my eyelashes felt like I was doing something necessary in my daily routine, like tying my shoelaces or brushing my teeth. And it also felt like a quick slap of decadence. Except curling my eyelashes isn’t essential for me to leave for the day, nor is it over the top. Yet, the delicious act felt necessary to get the day moving. Just a little bit of effort. Just a few more seconds to dedicate to oneself. My day wasn’t so blah after all.

How did I get here? How did I even think to curl my eyelashes? I chalk it up to allotting myself a bit more time. The night before, I read before bed instead of watching television. I kept my phone in the kitchen. (I’ve been waking up at 4 am and sometimes need to check it. No more!) I woke up early. I went to the gym. I ate a normal breakfast. I wasn’t rushing. The moment I clamped the Revlon curler to my eyelashes, it was like a pinch of spiritual enlightenment! A mind-body revelation. I realized that I gave myself time to think about these tiny, minuscule things that weren’t actually tiny or minuscule but instead were a massive step to enriching oneself. (I have a similar argument about manicures, although those take longer and aren’t necessarily part of a daily routine).

This is a far cry from the chaos of my late 20s when I lived in a windowless office room in Bushwick. I hated

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